When A People Pleaser Gets A Haircut

It’s useful, in limited situations, to be a people pleaser. Other than the emotional toll it takes on me, it also gets some good results. It makes sense, right? People like people pleasers. That’s the point.

But it’s not so spectacular to be a people pleaser with your hair stylist. Especially if she’s edgier, younger, and in a totally different demographic than you. Also, it’s bad if she’s drunk and/or high.

You know where this is going right? This post tees up my new do.

I have no one to blame but my codependent self. Right after Sadie was born, I instituted a cardinal hair rule: no bangs. The punishment for getting bangs would be having to have bangs so I felt like the rule would be easy to obey.

And it was. Til yesterday.

Me (to myself as I was parking the car): We are clear, right? No bangs.

Then, I sat down for that pre-cut chat.

Hair stylist: What are we doing with your hair today?

Me: I want to look less like a soccer mom.

Hair Stylist: How about bangs?

Me: OK

And that’s how I got this haircut that is, as close friends have pointed out, “not my best.”

At least now I can identify a new superpower: Cutting and Growing out bangs over and over until I die.

45 thoughts on “When A People Pleaser Gets A Haircut

  1. I laughed out loud – i’ve done the exact same thing (but not with bangs – never with bangs hahaha). but – i like it. and i just showed my mom and she likes bangs and thought you looked great. :) and i love the little pineapple tail sticking up next to you. :)

  2. I also laughed out loud and got busted not actually helping my kid with her homework. I’m not anti-bangs, but I’ve only recently grown mine out (ever…like 37 years’ worth of bang-wearing), and it took long enough that I feel obligated to stay sans bangs awhile longer. I think bangs shave a few years off, so soon I’ll need to undergo the shears because I’m anti-Botox. For now.
    I like an edgy stylist. I can tone anything down, but it’s hard to amp up a boring cut despite my arsenal of fine hair care products (you can have…uh sorry HAD…your Loft…I’ve got Ulta and Sally’s and a husband doomed to using my not so great purchases).
    I say rock the bangs for a few cuts…you’re young & cute and can pull it off.

  3. What does it say about me that I always want bangs and the hairdresser always talks me out of it? I must have “no hope” written all over my face. Is the whole thing short or do you have it pulled back? I can’t tell from the pic. What I can tell from the pic is you have some gorgeous hands! That’s ridiculous. You could get away with saying you were 25 with hands like that!

  4. You’re adorable! Bangs and all. I always shy away from getting bangs because I fear not knowing how to style them to look cute. Yours look great. Love you.

  5. OMG! OMG! OMG! We are cut from the same fringe. See what I did there? Anyway, I think you look adorbs. And I agree with Carinn about those gorgeously youthful hands. I’ve tried bangs once or ten times. It always ends with me pinning them back with bobbies, curling up in the fetal position on my bathroom floor and breathing through an anxiety attack. Just me?

  6. Anna got bangs a while back. I hate bangs, but I told her it looked nice for about a month until I cracked. She no longer has bangs, thank God.

  7. I don’t think the bangs look bad at all! I want to see what it looks like with the back down too. You are awesome, bangs or not.

    I always want bangs, but my fine, frizzy hair does not allow for them so I get them and I get mad at them and clip them off my face with a clip designed for a toddler.

  8. I think you look adorable! If my hair was as straight as it used to be and I wasn’t so fat, I’d wear bangs. But, alas, my hair is randomly curly and my face is totally round (like Charlie Brown). So no bangs for me. Given that I only get a haircut every 14 months, I can resist temptation by knowing that I’m coming out of the salon a new woman no matter what.

  9. The baby is sleeping on me right now and I’m trying to stifle my giggles so as not to wake her. This cracks me up! I’ve been reading a book lately (which is like a really big deal in my life) and I’m enjoying it so much just this morning I thought, “Huh. Maybe I could read another one.” After reading this I have decided I want to read your book next. Yes, this post. Of all of them. So get on that, all right?? ;)

  10. Well, I think you look great, but I totally hear you on the people pleasing front. I’ve never been talked into bangs, but I did once recently let a teenaged manicurist paint rainbows and flowers on my nails. She was so earnest, I just couldn’t say no!

  11. Pingback: Anatomy of Marital Argument: The Idiot and the A**Hole | Outlaw Mama

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