How hard should it be to go to the drug store and get deodorant? It should be easy enough, even if you pushed your 14-month old to do that one extra errand despite the fact that he (and you) were over-hungry.
But when I made my way down the deodorant aisle yesterday with Simon, I found all of it locked up like condoms or former governors of Illinois.
So I tried all the locks, and when that failed I looked around for a sales associate to break free some Secret for me. Guess how many Wal-Greens associates it takes to open the super secured deodorant cabinets. I have no idea because I never found a single one to help.
I didn’t have heaps of extra time to scour the aisles for someone with key privileges to assist me, because a over-hungry baby is like a time bomb. (And an over-hungry mom with pit stains is like a stick of homemade dynamite with a 1 centimeter fuse.) I finally just grabbed a minuscule travel-sized anti-perspiration stick and went to check out.
“How come the deodorant is locked up?” I asked the check-out lady. “Because people steal it and sell it on the black market for cheap.”
Who is engaging in this crime ring? Who is buying Old Spice from a petty crook, who no doubt wears an over-sized trench coat that has deodorant hanging on the inside of it? Whoever keeps this cycle of crime going, you need to know it is not a victimless crime– I have suffered the effects of missing the sweet spot of feeding Simon for which I paid the price for the next 17 hours. I hope you get caught and must endure the maximum sentence allowed by law.