Today’s topic: Dads who blog about being dads.
This weekend, a friend of mine — a 50-something dad with children ranging in ages from 4 to 24– emailed me to say he was going to start a blog. I thought he was joking, but he emailed back to say he had watched Julie & Julia and could see that there could be big bucks in blogging. I emailed him back and mentioned that there are about 17 million mommy bloggers and considerably fewer daddy bloggers, so having a penis and a kid or two would probably increase his odds of success.
Next thing I know, he’s sent me the working title of his blog and his first post. It was a strong opening salvo; it was funny, tender and featured both kiddie vomit and late night bullsh*t that goes on with children. I sat and stared at the screen and three thoughts came to my mind:
1. I should start a new blog under a daddy pseudonym, like “Father of the Pride” or “Daddy Is the New Mommy,” and write a fictitious blog about a stay-at-home dad.
2. I should convince Jeff to relax on his day job and start a blog, then we could create companion blogs about our lives. OH MY GOD, I am a genius.
3. I should give my Daddy Blogger friend whatever tips I think I know and then assure him that I don’t really know anything and implore him to seek professional help.
I opted for choice #3 (because I had meditated that morning as well and was feeling buoyed by spirituality). I decided to research the daddy blogs I know and see what I could glean about success or branding. I checked out five blogs and happened to see, for the first time ever, the pictures of the authors. My jaw still hurts from coming unhinged from the shock of seeing the countenances of the gentlemen who pen blogs about their broods, their wives’ breast pumps, and their own struggles that look just like mine, actually.
THEY ARE ALL SO F*CKING YOUNG. Seriously. I have more chest hair than these guys. They don’t look old enough for nocturnal emissions, much less sperm strong enough to make babies. It’s like Beaver Cleaver opened his lap top and started a witty journal about parenthood. I am not making a judgment on their attractiveness–mostly because if I did, I would feel like Mary Kay LeTourneau or Mrs. Robinson. Seriously, these guys looked like the boys I wanted to date in high school. It appears that half of my sample size (2.5 daddy bloggers) hold down breadwinner-type jobs and the other half parent on a full-time basis. They are definitely articulate and insightful
And here’s the thing, I don’t know any dads who blog (except for the aforementioned friend), which clearly informs my observations. (If you know any I should read, please send me the information.) I am not aware of any Daddy Bloggers posting comments on my blog or any dads who actually even read it (including my own, but that’s another
therapy session post). I certainly welcome daddy readers here. I do follow a few Daddy Bloggers that I stumbled upon from Huffington Post, Babble, and Freshly Pressed. (No, that is not bitterness and jealousy you detect here; remember, I meditate.)
When I followed up with my aspiring daddy blogger friend, I had to break it to him gently. For his profile picture he should use either a picture of his 23-year-old son or a film still of Brad Pitt in Meet Joe Black (which is Brad at his cleanest and his lips at their pouty-est) and hope for the best.