Babble, Schmabble

Photo courtesy of www.mediabistro.com

Photo courtesy of http://www.mediabistro.com

I am so sick of pretending that I love and follow Babble, because you know what, I don’t.  But everyone loves Babble.  It’s billed as the hipster parenting bible (whatever the hell that means). But, it makes my teeth itch and my fingernails fray when I log on.  I am not sure why.  In part, I just can’t stand how uber-witty and speaking-to-this-exact-moment all of it is.  And everyone has been following it forever, except for me.  It feels like walking into a party after all the great sh*t has already happened– the nakedness, the hook-ups, the fire started on the couch– and the only thing left is puking in your red Solo cup or accidentally drinking the cigarette ashes from the guy you hoped would take you home (but of course, he already went home hours ago).

I want to love it. I feel, as a blogger, I have to love it because it’s such a goddamned hub of everything that touches my daily life.
Here’s the website’s mission statement:  “To tell the truth about parenting, to bypass the clichés and dig into the magical and maddening reality. Our commitment to readers is to explore the world of parenting on a daily basis with ruthless honesty, and with the humor and lyricism natural to the subject.” (I found this on Wikapedia.com.)

Maybe it’s the sleep deprivation or the too-low Zoloft dose, but I can’t tell what the f*ck is going on there. I see recipes and fertility apps (what are those?) and tons of columns on pregnancy, babies and toddlers.  It’s too much. I feel like I need to be (more) heavily medicated to go there and figure out what the big ass deal is.

And there’s the suffocation factor.  Every “great” article or forward from my articulate, honest, and educated friends can be traced back to Babble.  How is that possible? It’s true that I wouldn’t even open an article from Parenting Magazine, because, hey, it’s not 1988 anymore.  But the point is, I never see articles from anywhere else.

I’ve always mistrusted hegemony.

Maybe it’s just that the site lacks intimacy for me.  I think I am a one website, one blogger kind of woman.  I love honest, non-cliched writing about motherhood (and everything else), and it just feels more comfortable to log on to Welcome To The Motherhood or Head Above Laundry or Mammalingo or A Teachable Mom or Life On The Mamariffic Merry-Go-Round.  I don’t need Babble to point me in the direction of great writing, because I have stumbled upon it myself.

Don’t get me wrong, I would love to be a featured blogger over there — do you think this post will hurt my chances?– but the acute ADD I suffer when I go to the actual website is a barrier to my enjoyment.  I think for now I will just get my second-hand Babble as filtered through my friends and all of you.  Unless you suggest otherwise….

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30 thoughts on “Babble, Schmabble

  1. Thank you for the mention, I am honored! I find your site to be an honest, well-written, intelligent oasis in the sea of motherhood/parenting chaos. There is one writer, in particular, I follow on Babble, but for the most part, the actual site itself is too much for me.

  2. Everyone does NOT love babble. There’s a sizable contingent of us who are continually annoyed by babble and avoid it. I do love a lot of their writers and don’t begrudge them being there, I probably would, too, since there’s $ involved. But yeah, feel no guilt.

    • What annoys you? Is it the tone, the content, the lay out…all of it? I keep thinking there is something wrong with me for not falling head over heels for it. Thanks for letting me know it’s ok.

      • It is kind of everything. They require such constant posting that I feel like I never see much there that’s actually useful or worthwhile. And the slideshows are the ultimate form of internet annoyance.

      • Oh, yes. Those slideshows annoy the crap out of me.. I always debate – funny blog vs. takes freaking forever to load slideshows.

  3. Hi, my name is Babble Hater, how are you? You know why I can’t stand Babble? It incites anger and judgement. Ever read those comments? Holy shmoly cow, those are some righteous mommas over there! And the writing? “Hi, my name is Copy Editor, do you mind if I explain what typos and dangling modifiers are?”

    Seriously, my name is Jodi.

    • I feel so much better!!! I have never read the comments, but now I want to check the out because I am intrigued and a little bored. Hilarious. Thanks for giving me your .2 cents!

  4. I’m with you. It’s like a CNN screen: zipper screen over here, stats over there, faces bobbling over on that corner…plus the babble fertility app? Really? I don’t want to put my phone in my hoochie, babblers, really, I don’t.

  5. Look what you did Outlaw Mama – you created your own convent! Look at all us commenting, feeling the same way. You created unity! I feel so proud to be a part of it.

    Wow, that was a lot of gushing, especially for a Friday. Clearly you aren’t the only one that needs a higher dose on the meds.

    Anyway, I agree with Jodi and Deborah in particular. The comments, the CNN information overload of it. Also agree with Jessica – they have great writers and I don’t begrudge them, but babble itself appears to be just a watered down version of what’s really good out there.

    Like you I prefer to follow a blog in its entirety. I want to catch you on your good days, your sadistic days, your funny days and your cry in the corner days. Babble just offers me snippets of everyone’s best. I need more complexity in my blog reading life.

  6. PS – a little technical feedback – only your links to the blogspot blogs actually work. You need to redo the links like this: http://welcometothemotherhood.com – it’s a wordpress glitch. I’ve already been stalking Lisa (love her comments on your posts) and I’d love to click to the other ones too.

    And please do everyone a favor and click the little box that says “open link in new window” because I really hate to lose my place on your page.

  7. I can barely catch my breath with all the “in” sites and babbling going on in this mommy blogging universe. Thank you for giving me permission to slow down and breathe … a convent is just my speed, especially if they don’t allow kids. I’ll go pack.

  8. Thank you for the mention! I’m so honored. And thank you for the kind words welcometothemotherhood.

    I hate the websites that do the slide shows….and sadly, more and more are doing them. I just want to read, not click. And I really hate the nasty commenters. Honestly, did their mothers teach them nothing. “Say something nice or don’t say anything at all” is the first thing every good mother teaches her children (well, maybe second…”wash your hands” is first). The meanest, nastiest things come from the parents portraying themselves as most perfect, which makes me wonder just how horrid their little offspring really are.

  9. I never even heard of it but maybe it’s not big in Canada. I go to Babycenter regularly–the Canadian version. Its discussion groups are sometimes helpful but also funny ….there are way too many hippy earth mother goddess types (breastfeeding is so magical, etc etc)! As for parenting magazines there is an American one that’s all advertising, fashion, how to dress like a celeb. Wtf? I recycle it soon after it arrives. I’m checking out Babble right now out of curiousity.

      • Well, the site is huge. You can get lost in there. Some stuff is great and some inane (why would I care about following one woman’s journey with plastic surgery?). The slide shows are annoying, especially within a blog post….a list that should take five seconds to read takes five minutes. It’s all a bit overwhelming but if you have patience and time to waste some info is useful. Mind you, I discovered Dd could be screwed for life since she does not crawl properly and may skip that phase. Thanks.

  10. Yeah, this is the first I’m hearing of Babble, too. Oh, well. Unrelated-ish side not, while I didn’t drink a cup of cigarette butts, I did once accidentally drink out of the dip cup of the boy I was madly in love with in high school.

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