I Birthed A Blog One Year Ago

One year ago, I birthed a blog. Drawing talent not yet born.

One year ago, I birthed a blog. Drawing talent not yet born.

The Onion: Outlaw Mama, Congratulations on one year of blogging.  That’s amazing. So few mothers have taken to blogging.  I am so glad someone finally started a Mommy blog.

Outlaw Mama: I know, right?  It’s like all these mothers were just sitting around with snippets of free time and no one thought to start creating on-line community until I came along.

The Onion: It sure looks like Mommy blogging might become a thing.  I read somewhere that you said you did for Mommy blogging what Al Gore did for the Internet.

Outlaw Mama: That’s right. I couldn’t have said it better myself.

The Onion: So in these past 12 months, what have you learned?

Outlaw Mama: Nothing.

The Onion: Wow. Nothing? Not one thing?

Outlaw Mama: No, I didn’t learn anything. I was already an awesome writer and a near-perfect mother. I didn’t really have anything to learn.

The Onion: Didn’t you at least learn how to Tweet a few months ago?

Outlaw Mama: Funny story about Twitter. I actually invented that too.

The Onion: I see. Well, you seem pretty open on your blog. Is there anything your readers don’t know about you?

Outlaw Mama: There are a few things.  I might as well say it now: I have never been to Costco.

The Onion: What? Never? But you talk about it–

Outlaw Mama: All the time. I know. I do.  Which, if you think about it, is super imaginative, because, like I said, I’ve never been there.

The Onion: Anything else?

Outlaw Mama: Most of my readers don’t know that I am actually a single man who lives in the Everglades.  I have no children.  I have never even held a baby.

The Onion: Why the ruse?

Outlaw Mama: I thought becoming a Mommy blogger would be a good way to meet chicks.

The Onion: Did it work?

Outlaw Mama: Sort of but it gets awkward when they meet me in person and are all “ooh, he’s so penis-y! He’s not even a mom.” Mothers, as you know, can be very judgmental.

The Onion: Do you have any advice for aspiring Mommy bloggers out there?

Outlaw Mama: I would say just be yourself.

The Onion: That means a lot coming from you.

Outlaw Mama: Oh, one other piece of advice.

The Onion: Yes?

Outlaw Mama: Wait until year two to release your sex tape.

The Onion: Is that something your readers can expect in the next year?

Outlaw Mama: Definitely.  I am just working on some production issues, but it’s in the works.

The Onion: Great.  Congratulations again.

Outlaw Mama: Thanks.


44 thoughts on “I Birthed A Blog One Year Ago

  1. My favorite illustration EVER!
    Well, thank you for squeezing it out for us. Can’t wait to see what the Terrible Two’s bring us.

  2. I would totally date you, man from Florida! Except that I am also a man from Florida! Congrats on your blogiversary and thank you for making me smile every day!

  3. Congrats on your blogiversary!! We love reading your “mommy blog” even if you are a dude from the Everglades! –The Dose Girls

  4. Seriously?! You are only 7 days older than me in blog years, but all this time I just assumed you’ve been doing it for a decade because you’re so dang good and consistent. Sheesh there goes my excuse. Happy birthday!!

  5. I can’t believe I missed your blog’s birthday!! Congrats on a year. And, brilliant anniversary post, which makes sense since so many of your posts are briliant!

  6. Catching up on my reading and saw I missed your big anniversary. Congrats! And I’m not surprised you’re really a man. I felt strangely attracted to you all this time and thought I was like 20+ years late on the whole “chick-crush” thing. Now I understand my strange attraction. Thanks! 🙂

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