A Gratitude 180

I’m grateful for the obvious. My kids, my husband, my house, my job, my health and friends.

What about the things I wish were different? Can I be grateful for those?

What would it feel like to be grateful for gray hairs, extra pounds, consequences of poor choices, and dreams deferred?

Today I put those too on my gratitude list, for they are as much a part of my life as the parts going exactly according to my plans and desires.

And I’m grateful to them, those things I wish were different, because they are mine, and in a state of gratitude, I may be able to make better use of their un-idealness. I may be more open to their lesson, their meaning. To how they may serve my transcendence.

Surely, gratitude is a better use of time than all the energy bound up in futile attempts to change reality and bend it to my will.

I am grateful, then, that there are no shortcuts to the desires deep within me. There’s no express train to comfort and peace of mind. But there is this moment, this mixed bag of beauty and longing, and here I am. So I’m choosing to greet it with “welcome,” “thank you,” and “please teach me.”

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21 thoughts on “A Gratitude 180

      • So far, I am not sure what to think of my grey hairs, which three family members have all noticed now. Extra pounds- I have many. Consequences of poor choices: it wasn’t the best way to cope with the trauma and abuse, but, I think most of the nightmares are over, even if the flashbacks are still there. And dreams deferred? That’s like, my entire undergrad experience, 1992-2000, and then descent into disability, 2002-2007.

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